Deacon Blue - Fergus Sings The Blues

I saw Deacon Blue live once. They're really good...

Since my relationship with started, it's really made me think about past relationships.
The most obvious to me is Stefan. My first 'Proper' boyfriend.
I realised how fucked up i became with him. But tbh i also realised JUST how close we were. I mean even now i feel the need to tell him everything. And i know i can. We just get eachother, its lovely. But we suit more as friends then as a couple, and i hope he has a soft spot for me just as i do for him - i always will.
Stefan is skinny. He's really skinny. I mean he's literally just skin and bones - his stomach is about the width of my thigh. At the time he was going through a bad period - and he thought he was fat. He genuinely did... and it made me feel truly terrible. I mean i was actually mentally ill or something at that point - i started smoking, drinking & self harming. I was anorexic for half a year and bulimic for the other half. I don't know why but i went through a crazy stage. I was really... really weird, and i can't explain it but people noticed. It's not stefans fault. i dont really understandd what happened to me back then - that was a really scary part of my life.


Ollie.
Aha. 4 week disaster?
Well it wasn't a disaster at first. It just turned out to be. Ollie's in my year. Cute. Popular. Footballer & cricketer. Typical GUY. Fancies anything that moves. We'd been speaking on msn constantly throughout mine & stef's relationship, and he told me he liked me. After a while i realised I'd started to like him back. My friend's party was the following week, and he asked if we could talk at the party. I'd never really talked to him properly since he told me he liked me, so i was nervous. At the party, as he'd asked, we spent the whole thing together. It was a garden party, and there was fireworks. He stood behind me with his arms wrapped around my waist - and we watched the fireworks in the rain. It really was amazing and i was SO happy.
We started spending every break & lunchtime together. He'd always come to find me, and apologise heartily when he'd had football training or something.
We talked on msn every evening - and he found out that i HATED 'asking out' and everything it stands for. So the next day he took me for a walk, and said 'Well i think you're really nice, really pretty, and really funny. Do you want to be boyfriend & girlfriend?' (or something similar). I grinned my head off and said 'yeah :) ok'. We were together alot after that - unfortunately it was 2 weeks before the summer, and for the second week the whole year (apart from me and a few others) went on an activities trip in France. Stuff happened... and we broke up during the summer.

By stuff happened, i mean mike happened.
Michael. The desperate twat.